Funny Friendship Quotes

Want some funny quotes that describe the meaning of friendship? Then look no further because here are some funny friendship quotes to highlight the humorous side of this very important relationship.

• A friend is one who knows us, but loves us anyway. ~ Fr. Jerome Cummings

• Love is blind; friendship closes its eyes. ~ Anonymous

• Marriage is a sort of friendship recognized by the police. ~ Anonymous

• Men kick friendship around like a football, but it doesn't seem to crack. Women treat it like glass and it goes to pieces. ~ Anne Morrow Lindbergh

• One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are committed by people who know the victim. ~ George Carlin

• Friendship. A ship big enough to carry two in fair weather, but only one in foul. ~ Ambrose Bierce

• An old friend will help you move. A good friend will help you move a dead body. ~ Jim Hayes

• A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked. ~ Bernard Meltzer

• Give me one friend, just one, who meets the needs of all my varying moods. ~ Esther M. Clark

• Love is blind. Friendship tries not to notice. ~ Anonymous

• I got a lot of best friends. Some o' them I don't even hardly know! ~ Archie Bunker

• It takes a long time to grow an old friend. ~ John Leonard

• Only your real friends will tell you when your face is dirty. ~ Sicilian proverb

• Friends are God's ways of apologizing for our families. ~ Anonymous

• Tis the privilege of friendship to talk nonsense, and have her nonsense respected. ~ Charles Lamb

• Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, 'What! You too? I thought I was the only one. ~ C.S. Lewis

• Show me a genuine case of platonic friendship, and I shall show you two old or homely faces. ~ Austin O'Malley

• Friendship is a pretty full-time occupation if you really are friendly with somebody. You can't have too many friends because then you're just not really friends. ~ Truman Capote

• A true friend is one who overlooks your failures and tolerates your success! ~ Doug Larson

• I have lost friends, some by death, others through sheer inability to cross the street. ~ Virginia Woolf

• The best time to make friends is before you need them.  ~ Ether Barrymore

• We must hang together, or surely we shall hang separately. ~ Benjamin Franklin 

• One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are committed by people who know the victim. ~ George Carlin

• There are 3 faithful friends, an old wife, an old dog, and ready money. ~ Benjamin Franklin, who appears on $100 bill 

• You want a friend in Washington? Get a dog. ~ Harry Truman

• A true friend stabs you in the front. ~ Oscar Wilde 

• Friendship is like money, easier made than kept. ~ Samuel Butler

• A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked. ~ Bernard Meltzer